Have you ever met an introvert?
If yes, maybe you are one of the people whom may have called them ‘weird’, ‘mood-killer, or worst is ‘creepy’, subconsciously.
Maybe you might somehow hated them quite a bit subconsciously, as well.
If not, well done!
By any means, let me give you some ideas about them which you may not know about. So, if you encounter them, you may somehow understand them.
1. They love to talk.
Many people have long thought that introverts do not like talking at all. In fact, they love to talk and speak whenever they want as long as the topic has got their attention. They love to talk about the topics that has more sense, ideal, or creative. However, once the topic has changed even for a bit, they start to lose interest and focus. Then, you’ll notice that they will start to become quiet. For example, in a party, they may socialize for a bit but they get bored easily if they don’t get someone to talk to about something that makes them interested.
2. They open up.
Once an introvert gave a hint about their feelings, for example, “I feel annoyed today…“, it means that they want to share it. However, there is real catch! You must respond or acknowledge it in just few seconds, because like what I’ve said in no. 1, they will easily lose interest. In this case, they will not continue telling it anymore because unlike extroverts, they can only maintain their hype in a short period of time.
On the other hand, once you acknowledge them in time, rest assured that you will hear their thoughts as long as you do not interrupt them. Yes! You heard it right and that is the third one!
3. Do not interrupt them
Have you heard about the term ‘momentum‘? Since sharing their thoughts is not their thing, it is best not to interrupt them when they are trying to share anything. Do not give long responses or your own thoughts at first and give that moment to them because when you try to give other thoughts, they start to process what you’ve said which diverts their own pre-thoughts and leads to new thought process. Because of that, you won’t be able to hear out what they were really thinking.
This method does not only apply on introverts. This is most effective to them because this is their way of hearing out other people which makes them good listeners. Thus, do not force them to speak out, hence, just be a good listener.
4. They are sensitive
Engaging in conversations drain their energy as this is something that is embedded in their genes and it is not so easy to just change it as it is the make up of their DNA. Thus, whenever they feel drain, they try their best to stick in the group and not to leave because they think that people around him would feel uncomfortable. Every time you push them to be outgoing or outspoken, it drains them more. However, to be able to make you feel acknowledged, they will try everything it takes to grant your request even if it sucks out their energy. This may sound anti-social but it is not. They are just very soft-spoken and solitude in terms of character.
5. They also feel shame and depression
You might think that they always wanted be alone, but not always. They love being with someone they value and trust the most. People who are introvert may seem cold and emotionless, but they also feel shame because of their indifference with others. Just as I have mentioned earlier, they are also sensitive individuals which you might not notice; they are more sensitive than extroverts at some point as they see your feelings deeply and in a different way – making them understand your feelings even though they do not show enough emotions like other people do and even if you are not telling it. The problem is, it is difficult for them to confide with you about how they feel or about your feelings. Because of this, you might also think that they lack interest with what you feel but they are. Once they noticed that you are thinking that way, they usually feel shame and guilt of not being able comfort you the way you wanted to. This tends to drain their energy because they develop this feeling of unworthiness – they are not enough for you. And this leads them to depression and shame about their limits as introverts.
6. They understand extroverts
Yes! They actually understand you even if you are an extrovert. This is because they are keen observers and love to study about how people around them behave so that they could somehow get into the society or help someone. Since there are more people who are extroverts than introverts that you could meet around, it is more common to encounter people with the former personality. Thus, this gives them opportunity to interact and learn more about extroverts. In fact, they understand extroverts more than how extroverts understand their self, which makes them a very good partner and companion. If you are very close to them or they like you that much, they will do their best to prevent you from hurting your feelings in the future. They are even willing to sacrifice their self just for you. For example, they will allow you to project your frustrations or divert your anger to them even if it drains them. However, you do not easily notice this because they do not want to divulge it. Why? Simple, that is one of their ways to show their love – quiet but sincere. Do not worry, they do not lose their affection just because of this. Thus, you are one of the luckiest persons if you encountered this because they rarely do this.
Unfortunately, in reality, many people take them for granted as they do not seem to fit the criteria of the society to be outgoing and revealing – making them more mysterious and unique – usually called as ‘geeks’ or ‘weirdos’.
7. They are visionaries
They always think years ahead. This seem like futuristic which it really is. The reason why they always look so busy even if they are alone or awake in the middle of the night is because of this. Thinking about the future and trying to finish works in advance is their thing, because they have this ideal mind of infinite compassion to ones goal – in short, goal-centered.
To give you an example, when they work, they want to finish things as soon as possible without losing quality to their work which may lead to overwork. However, they do not see this as such because their mindset is to finish it so that they will be able to relax or watch that favourite movie one day.
8. They are loyal
Since they are not sociable, it is quite difficult to get the trust of an introvert; but once you prove yourself, it’ll be beyond your expections. They are the most loyal people because they understand feelings deeper than you think. Despite judgments that they are insensitive due to their lack of showing emotion, they will do their best not to leave you despite of any negative things you’ve done to them. However, there is always a limit. Once they felt your loyalty to them fading, they fade more.
9. They are true lovers
Loyalty does not always come with sincerity, but for introverts, it is always a package. Though sometimes, you may not see them sincere because of how they outspoken their words without the ‘expected’ or ‘common’ emotions that will show sincerity. Remember, they cannot easily show emotions but of course, they have it. With their loyalty and sincerity, as someone loved by an introvert, you will be assured of their true love. Add to this their visions of your future together. Once this had developed, it will be difficult for them to lose you.
On the other side, as you may see, they are still not perfect. The most common problem of a couple with an introvert is the lack of communication. Despite the fact that they are together, they may not be able to always connect their minds specially if the other is an extrovert.
However, this is where true love on both sides will kick in which makes them a perfect couple.
To understand more about what this last statement means, you may subscribe and watch out for my next article entitled, “The Ambi-relationship.“
- HATE AN INTROVERT - July 8, 2020
